Day 33

Last night the drummer boy thought that he would come for another short visit. But at least he didn't stay long. Sleep beat him at his own game.

This morning waking up is slow and walking is causing me to feel my heart beat in my brain. Sounds funny I know. It's not painful yet so I can't call it a headache. It's just a very loud boom boom boom boom boom. It's one of those things that you know will become painful if you don't sit down and get it to stop.

I'm getting better slowly...I know I am. I just wish it would come faster.

My mouth is a mess. But slowly getting better. My stomach is a mess, Sandy called it a sort of medicinal shock. So many drugs over such a short period of time has sent my stomach into vomiting episodes. (sorry it's gross)

I don't know why I didn't expect it. I feel like I'm eating the pharmacy every day. I've been reduced to clear liquids and ginger ale. Hopefully I can start eating something more substantial soon as my weight had dropped to 123 last Monday and I know it's even less today. I feel too skinny again and I absolutely hate it! It was one of my worst fears going into this and now all that I can do is hope that it begins to tapper off and that I can find a way to gain some of it back. For now my stomach is a traitor.

I go back to Hershey on Monday. They would have had me come today but I didn't get the Nupregen and Procrit injections fast enough for them to have time to make a big enough difference on my blood levels. They think that my levels should be better by Monday and Dr. Smith wants to see me then also.

It will be 2 weeks without Interferon and 1 week without Riba. I hope the virus has not made a come back. My own cells have not been surviving well in this cesspool of a body, hopefully neither have any viral cells. My fingers are crossed.

I'm getting better. I'm getting stronger. It's just coming so very slowly.