I started pulling out of the funk that I've been in since Friday night. I was so worried on Saturday that I would stay there. I had started trying to figure out how I would be able to function during the upcoming work week feeling so weighed down from these drugs...it worried me.
I thought to myself that I'd just have to walk very slowly as my heart rate would shoot up from just walking across the room.
I also began trying to imagine a place that I could lay down at work for a few minutes if I needed to. I could only think of my car since our new office is under construction and there really isn't much extra room where we are right now.
But hopefully I won't need the plan. Last night I began feeling better. Maybe it was all the stuff that Jimmy went shopping for and I forced down my throat.
This morning waking up isn't all that easy, but I am waking up and my mind is slowly clearing. My body still feels weak, but not to the point that I can't function.
There seems to be a high pitch screach in my ears now since Thursday. It's kind of irritating, but I find that I can ignore it most of the time.
There's also some kind of rash popping up in patches here and there. My elbows have the worst of it. The back of my hands have some of it and there are a couple of spots on the palms of my hands. They itch and sting at the same time. Jimmy said they look like hives. I don't know what they are....
son of a bitchin' dragon and these drugs!!
Going to Hershey today. I should get the results of my first blood work back but I'm not expecting too much as the first results are only from 1 week after my first shot. Not much could have changed in one week. I'm more interested in the results that will come back from this weeks bloodwork.
7am. I guess I better go swallow some pills and get ready for Hershey.
I'm trying very hard to stay in this fight. I wish that the side effects would start taking it easy on me soon. It's only been 15 days on this and there are so many more to go. I'm hoping that I'm just in the adjustment period....learning the in's and out's of how to take care of myself through this. I'm hoping that it was my fault that I became to sick on Friday and Saturday by not eating right and not taking life as easy as I should have. I have to start excepting that I am not healthy and well and that I have got to give into what my body needs and wants. I think I'm just too used to telling it to push through and do as my mind say's. I'm finding that the drugs push harder and will hurt me if I do not listen.
Like I said though, "I'm hoping" that I caused myself to be sick. Because if I didn't and this is just what the drugs do regardless of what I do....really don't know how the hell I'm going to make it through 45 more weeks of this.
One day at a time....I'm looking at today now. Not yesterday and tomorrow.
Only today.
Today I'm not yet myself but my friend ducky is pushing forward out of the dark.
1 comment:
The rash is most likely eczama caused by the Ribavirin. An exception would be a reaction to the study drug. This occured in the Vertex trials and 13% were pulled out of the study for the rash as compared to 3% for the control group.
Mine is cured in short order by applying a steroidal cream available by prescription called Fluoinonide. I started with 1% solution and it did nothing. I moved up to 5% and it was gone in a day.
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