Time is going by too fast.
Why do you suppose that as you get older time seems to move faster? Or is just me not wanting the Summer to end.
Jimmy's away this weekend and I have too much time to myself. I never minded spending time by myself.....but it seems harder right now.
The appartment seems so big and at night somewhat scary since the burgary. I feel safe when he's here.
Of course I have the place locked up like Fort Knox. Dead bolted, Knob locked, the security System armed and phone right beside me. But still.....every little sound in house keeps me awake.
I'm sure this feeling will pass.
Tonight I'll probably sleep like a log. Between not sleeping last night, working today and the wonderful magic hour of the 7pm fatigue that hits every night.....I'm gonna lay my head down and the world come down around me, I don't think it will be able to wake me.
I keep reading Teahs Blog just to see how she's doing. She's incredible. I will be just as strong when it's my turn. If you need a little boost and whole lot of info her blog is the place to go. She listed under my "Hero's".
It was Jimmy's 50 th Birthday this weekend. I thought I'd be a normal person and have a glass of wine. Like an idiot I had 3-1/2 glasses. Why do I do that? I'm not an alcoholic.....I just
somehow started believing that it's what normal people do.
What's with that? I know it's not good. And I know that I spent Sunday feeling like I couldn't get up. God seems to have a way of going knock knock on me. And when his little taps are ignored he tends to whack me upside the head.
So I get it....for the final time....I can either make myself sick and have a glass of wine...or I can decide to feel good and know that feeling good is what truly is normal.
Maybe I'll have to read this to myself every once and a while.
But for know I think I'll go lay down, the rest of my house work will have to wait for tomorrow night.
and the Summer goes speeding by.....
Why do you suppose that as you get older time seems to move faster? Or is just me not wanting the Summer to end.
Jimmy's away this weekend and I have too much time to myself. I never minded spending time by myself.....but it seems harder right now.
The appartment seems so big and at night somewhat scary since the burgary. I feel safe when he's here.
Of course I have the place locked up like Fort Knox. Dead bolted, Knob locked, the security System armed and phone right beside me. But still.....every little sound in house keeps me awake.
I'm sure this feeling will pass.
Tonight I'll probably sleep like a log. Between not sleeping last night, working today and the wonderful magic hour of the 7pm fatigue that hits every night.....I'm gonna lay my head down and the world come down around me, I don't think it will be able to wake me.
I keep reading Teahs Blog just to see how she's doing. She's incredible. I will be just as strong when it's my turn. If you need a little boost and whole lot of info her blog is the place to go. She listed under my "Hero's".
It was Jimmy's 50 th Birthday this weekend. I thought I'd be a normal person and have a glass of wine. Like an idiot I had 3-1/2 glasses. Why do I do that? I'm not an alcoholic.....I just
somehow started believing that it's what normal people do.
What's with that? I know it's not good. And I know that I spent Sunday feeling like I couldn't get up. God seems to have a way of going knock knock on me. And when his little taps are ignored he tends to whack me upside the head.
So I get it....for the final time....I can either make myself sick and have a glass of wine...or I can decide to feel good and know that feeling good is what truly is normal.
Maybe I'll have to read this to myself every once and a while.
But for know I think I'll go lay down, the rest of my house work will have to wait for tomorrow night.
and the Summer goes speeding by.....
6 comments:
Hi, I just found your blog, and if you don't mind, I'm going to make it a link on mine. (I think I found yours linked to Tea's.) I'll be back to read more later.
P.S. - You can get rid of Spam comments, like the one at the beginning of your blog, by clicking on the little trash can symbol next to them.
Thank you!
Laurie : ) I did not know my blog ment something at all. WOW I'm happy! It means I have not started doing it for nothing.
About locking your apartment: believe me, you are not alone. I lock it, then I put pots and pens infront of it (so I can hear if someone opens my door), I put a phone, knife and a flashlight next to my bad. Crazy, ha? Better safe than sorry.
Drinking wine.... oh.... I so miss it. I was telling Unsertain about it, I miss my glass of "Cosmopolitan" with lots of ice!
I think you can drink a little before getting treatment. Don't make yourself feel guilty.
Your blog was the first blog that I found Teah....every word on it is important to me. You guy's have become my mentors and are prepairing me and my Husband for what is to come. No one else is capaple of teaching me other than those people who have gone through it.
I sincerly appreciate every word that you write and I thank God that all of you are here.
And by the way....the appartment is now locked up tighter than fort nox and has security system ready to be set when Jimmy is away. My Mustang stays in the garage even if I'm home for a minute. The garage is totally impossible to break into....I know because once we lost the remote and tryed for weeks to break into it.
So when I go home I lock Hazleton and it's crime out! or at least I try to....
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